Things are going great, and they’re only getting better

So yesterday I posted (and tweeted, and status-updated) about how Heinz has started to make ketchup in dippable packets.

I was talking with my wife about how cool it is when you want somebody to invent something and then they do! My life gets better, and all I had to do was nothing.

During our conversation, my wife asked if anything else had been invented during my lifetime that makes my life better. And as I thought about it, I realized that almost everything I ever wanted to be invented has been invented.

For example:

• When I was youth playing Star Wars on the Atari 2600, I wished there was a way to play life-like battle games with (and against) other people, each from our own houses. Done.
• During my Dungeons and Dragons days, I hoped that someday, someone would make a decent Lord of the Rings movie. Done.
• After buying my first stereo component with 24-CD storage, I wished there was a way to store all of my music in one place, create custom playlists, and maybe even take it in my car. Done.
• Whenever I saw somebody on TV that looked familiar, I wished there was a place where I could see a full list of every actor in the world, cross-referenced with every role they’ve ever played. Done
• Anytime my wife started talking to me during a Steelers game, I wished there was a way to pause and rewind live TV. Done.
• When TV was only showing repeats, I wished there was a way to rent a movie without having to go to the video store. Done and done.

And now the ketchup packet thing pretty much completes the list.

All in all, everything that I had ever hoped for in life has already happened. Even the Steelers have won two Super Bowls in the last few years.

Yep. Everything is going better than could ever be imagined.

Except, of course, for those things I have to do myself.

Like get in shape.

Or make more money than I spend

Or become successful at anything at all.

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<Long, introspective pause.>

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Hey, my Netflix of Return of the King Special Edition just arrived! See you later! Enjoy the video!

PS. I know. I’m not the first comedian to point out how awesome everything is.